happy halloween!

your character wakes up in the past, when they were still with a lover who would later on break their heart. how do they handle this?

Writing Prompt #4 Your character wakes up in the past, when they were still with a lover who would later on break their heart. How do they handle this?

As I wake up, I notice something familiar, yet somewhat foreign. His smell: that wonderful smell of him.

I stretch to shake off my drowsiness and hear his voice, “Good morning, Sleepy.”  His face is close to mine and he playfully kisses my nose. I love it when he does that.

My mind races to place this moment. Was I having déjà vu? We are in bed with the sunlight peaking through a curtain I forgot to fully close. He was always careful about making sure no light would get through, but I wasn’t. I could sleep through almost anything.

He is in a really good mood this morning and I remember exactly how he looked when the sun hit him on this particular day.  This day is when we realize we are in love.

This was almost 3 years to the day when he would take his own life because of the depression he suffered after losing his brother to a freak accident the year before. No one could lift him out of the darkness. No one could reach him,… not even me.

I had often awoken to moments like these, when the past came back to life with memories so vivid and real that for a moment, everything seemed as it was, as it should have been. I would reach for him and feel the coolness of the sheets, where he used to lie beside me, only to fully awaken to realize he was indeed, still gone.

This is different. I feel his warmth as he lies next to me. I feel his strong arms as he pulls me closer. He smiles that incredible smile, just as I remember, looks down at me and blurts out, “I love you so much!”

“I love you too!” I reply feeling my heart swell; this is the first time we ever say those words to each other. Relief washes over him as he pulls me even closer to him and kisses me deeply.

Tears started to well in my eyes, but I push them down. I need to enjoy this moment. I kiss him deeper and hold him tighter.

I don’t ever want to let go.

a story in 100 words, take 2

I liked this prompt so much I wrote another one. 

write a 100 word story about one moment

“This better be as good as she says” I thought to myself. My best friend had raved about this place, home to the “best burger EVER”…

Ahem.

I surveyed the burger. {sniff} it smells great… it looks great!

Per her recommendation, I got the Classic burger: double patties made out of chuck beef and pork, grilled onions, hold the cheese, on a Brioche bun.

PB & J Burger from American Ale

I took a bite.

She was right.

I saw the joy in her eyes as she saw my reaction.

I think I may have died and gone to burger heaven.

I’ll never “EVER” doubt her again.

write a 100 word story about one moment

Taking more liberties. This isn't technically one moment, but it kinda is...

Writing Prompt #3: write a 100 word story about one moment

“Pizza, French Fry, Pizza, French Fry!” I repeated to myself as I picked up speed and slowed down. It was the first time I was on skis.

Kids whizzed by me, “French Frying” it all the way down.

“Damn their low center of gravity!” I grumbled under my breath.

“Come on, NO FEAR!” my boyfriend yelled as he flew by.

He had already bombed passed me five times. I was still on my first run down the bunny slope.

“Screw it!” I thought.

I mustered up all my courage.

“BANZAI!” I yelled, and zoomed down the rest of the run.

a person dies and is confronted by the person they have become

I might have taken a few liberties with this idea as well...

Writing prompt #2 a person dies and is confronted by the person they have become

I always heard that your entire life flashes before you right before you die.  Imagine my surprise when I found that the life that “could have been” flashed before me after I passed away.

I “crossed over” at 24. I had been hit by a car when I was on a sidewalk in Venice Beach. The driver lost control of the vehicle because he had a seizure and killed 4 of us.  It was a tragic accident.

It was like a scene out of “A Christmas Carol”, where Ebenezer Scrooge was viewing his “Christmas yet to come” alternate life. I was like a ghost witnessing what my future could have been, but without a host to show me around. Not that I needed one. I recognized myself right away.

At first I was back at the scene of my death. But instead of being run down, a man had grabbed me and pulled me to safety. Unfortunately the other three were struck, as the tragedy could not have been avoided.

I remember him pulling me out of the way in the nick of time.  We locked eyes as what had happened started to set in my mind. I was almost killed!

Soon after, the scenario started to morph around me, taking me to another snapshot of my life.  My savior and I were rock climbing in a remote part of the world. No one else was around us. When we got to the top, he got down on one knee.

The scenario transformed again. The man who had saved me was at the end of the aisle. My father was walking me towards him with a quartet playing a beautiful song. I was grinning ear to ear, looking at all the faces of my family and friends, smiling, taking pictures, and videoing our moment. I felt such joy and happiness.

Another scene: I’m in a boardroom, commanding a meeting. I could tell I was important the way everyone was tentatively listening to me and nodding in agreement.

Scene after scene came and went, but the one that lingered was one of me lying on a bed, my head wrapped in a scarf. My hair was all gone; my body was weak from chemo that treated my breast cancer. I was surrounded by my husband and three adults that appeared to be our children.  They were smiling through tears, talking about the good times we had. The battle was officially over. I refused additional treatment and was ready. My family was sad to see me go, but relieved that I would suffer no more.

At this point tears were streaming down my face. I was so joyful. Dr. Seuss’s quote swam in my mind, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” My “could have been” life was so full and rich with love and success. Even though it would never happen, seeing the possibility elated me.

The scenario morphed again; this time I was young again, maybe 36 or 37. I had just gotten my bearings. I was sitting in a crowd in a large theater  I was surrounded by hundreds of beautiful people, all dressed to the nines: men in tuxedos, women in vibrant ball gowns. My feet were throbbing in 4” heels that were a burgundy that matched my gown.  My husband was next to me when I heard, “And the Oscar for best actress goes to… for her portrayal of…” I saw myself get up and go on stage to accept the award.

I was so confused until I realized most of those previous scenes I had witnessed; they were from me becoming a successful actress. The only truth was that I was indeed married to the man who had saved me. He was an up-and-coming actor when we first met and together we had built our careers in various roles. We were like a real life Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, filming several movies together. The marriage was real, though the proposal was a scene in one of our movies. The last two scenes were also different roles in movies I had starred in.

My husband and I got home from the awards ceremony and after parties. It was nearly dawn and he had helped me get out of my dress. After the dress was off, he embraced me and gave me a Hollywood kiss, "I'm SO proud of you!"

We were very happy and blessed with the success we had attained.

I was in the shadow, watching myself remove my makeup and brush out my hair. Unexpectedly, my alternate self acknowledged me for the first time. She stopped what she was doing, looked directly into my eyes, and said,”this is what life could have been…”

I nodded and smiled to myself as I headed towards the light.

visual stimulation of the scenic variety

For those of you who know me, you know my camera is usually close by. I LOVE pictures.

I'm one of those annoying Asian kids taking pictures of their food (not to post on FB, mind you, but to use for my yelp profile, thank you very much!) and sometimes (though rarely, I promise!) I'm one of those annoying people that seem to stop suddenly because something catches my eye. It's more of a slight pause before I get out of the way before taking the picture. 

Anyway, earlier this year I got my hands on a Canon SLR so I could experiment. None of these pictures have been touched up. Heck, all of them were taken with "autofocus", but I figured adjusting settings would be step 2 in the learning process. =) 

I'm mainly taking scenic shots for now. Not too hard when there is so much to appreciate.

Central Coast

On a lazy weekend, the bf and I took a coastal drive up the 101N. I have no idea where we stopped, but it was a beautiful day and we took a long stroll. As you can tell, it's not the usual sandy beach that most people are used to.

Lake Cachuma, CA

My friend from Boston was in town. He told me that he stayed at Lake Cachuma and that it was a great area. Another friend was visiting, so we took a short drive to check it out. Fun place for families, with lots of activities like kayaking and camping. I think one of the best things about coming here was the view of the drive. It's pretty much all up hill and the view is beautiful.

The Mission, Santa Barbara, CA

The Mission is one of the many sites that people are drawn to when visiting Santa Barbara. It's a beautiful building and according to the website, tells the history of how "Santa Barbara began."

There is a garden across the way, where you can picnic and toss around a frisbee. It's a sight to see when roses are in bloom.

East Beach might as well be my second home here. I usually go on daily walks/ jogs along this beach. The boardwalk is usually full of

East Beach, Santa Barbara, CA

joggers, bikers, walkers, and surreys. I've also been known to play beach volleyball here, when there are enough people.

It's also home to Chase Palm Park, which, once you see the array of trees, know it could not have been named anything else. (The Palm Park portion, that is!)

So... I admit, I also use my camera phone quite a bit and have an instagram account. Here are a few of my faves:

View of Santa Barbara from the Courthouse

The Santa Barbara Courthouse is one of my favorite places to take visitors. For one, it's just around the corner from a great gelato place for which I have known to frequent more than once a day, ahem... (what can I say?! it was a hot day!) two, it has a beautiful courtyard which is a great location to enjoy said gelato, and three, during the summer they have movie screenings (which, again, you can partake in maybe another gelato...). This is also a very popular wedding destination.

This beach was on a different drive down the coast. My friend and I stopped at a rest stop to check out the view. The central coast is such a scenic drive.

We saw a railroad track below the viewing area. Naturally, we had to take a closer look, but he couldn't stop there. My friend was determined to find a way down to the ocean and since I was already halfway down, I had to get a glimpse myself. Can't let him have all the fun!

When we were coming up, we found a better, safer way to get down, (of course) but it was a nice way to add a little adventure to the day.

Laguna Beach sky

Ok, no more sales pitches of how great Santa Barbara is.

This sky was one of those moments where I looked up and was stopped in my tracks. I loved the way the clouds were reflecting the sun and the silhouette of the palm trees...

I know I sound corny. What can I say? I appreciate nature.

I mean, come on, that's one cool picture!

you pick up the phone to call a friend and realize that you are on the line with yourself 5 years ago... Part 2

I say "Part 2" but this is not a continuation of the last story. It's what a conversation with myself from 5 years ago would really be like. 

Astoria, OR

“You remember Dexter?” I asked my younger self.

“Yeah! The Canadian that almost got us killed?” I exaggerated.

“Yup, the one who always said that' life was about the journey'.” Elder me confirmed.

“What about him?”

“Well, he’s right. You will probably always be re-evaluating what you want to do with your life, but while you are doing so, don’t forget to enjoy yourself.”

“Care to elaborate?”

“Do you REALLY want a preview, or do you want it to be a surprise?”

Laguna Beach, CA

“Preview please!” younger me begged.

“Gah, FINE!” I replied, exasperated. These youngin’s,  so damn impatient; and here I thought I was different and more mature at that age. I guess not. Hmph.

“In these 5 years, you will meet over 100 people. You will live in unexpected places and will travel to over 20 new cities across 7 countries and 3 continents. You will go through some good times and some bad. “

“While that’s nice to hear, it’s still somewhat vague, “  younger me observed.

“I know, so get off the phone and START LIVING!” And with that I hung up.

you pick up the phone to call a friend and realize that you are on the line with yourself 5 years ago...

As Reddit's Writing Prompt blew up because of this amazing story, I decided I would take advantage of this site and use some of these prompts to help me when I have "creative ideas block". 

Writing Prompt #1:

You pick up the phone to call a friend and realize that you are on the line with yourself 5 years ago. Write about the conversation that ensues.

I took some liberties with this one but I hope you enjoy it anyway. 

It was a lazy Saturday morning. The hubby had taken our daughter on her play date at his sister’s so I could sleep in.  I looked at the clock and it was half past 9am. My cousin should be awake. I missed her and wanted to catch up.

I reached for my cell phone and dialed her land line. She had been resistant to technology, insisting that a regular phone was better because it never lost a call and she didn't have to always be “available”.

“Hello?” an odd, but familiar voice answered.

“Hi! Jenn?!”

“Oh sorry, she’s out of town for the weekend, can I take a message?” said the girl.

“Uh, yeah, can you tell her this is Christi?”

“Sure. Does she have your number?”

“Yeah, um, who is this?” I asked the girl.

“I’m Christi, her cousin.”

“Wait, what!? I’m her cousin Christi.” I replied, bewildered.

I knew I was the only one cousin named Christi, was this a joke?!

After several more rounds of questioning, we realized, we were indeed, the same person, but she was 5 years younger.

She is (was) the 22 year old Christina rooming with our cousin Jenn, still figuring herself out. At the time, she didn't have a cell phone either. Little did she know, in a few months, she/I would meet Jake and in a year she/I would be married. She had no idea what lie ahead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now, things are finally starting to get better since “limbo” ended.

That’s how we refer to it now, my affair. It was before we had our daughter, about a year after we got married.

It all started from a simple and innocent question:

Which class should I take: photography or art?

On the one hand, I already had a decent camera that my brother could let me use. On the other, I have always wanted to get some formal training in painting. I dabbled with pencil sketches and pastels, but I really wanted to learn how to paint.

At my new husband’s encouragement, I took the art class.

The community college I attended was very well known for its visual arts and literature programs. Most of the classes required collaboration with another medium; in this particular case it was pairing up creative writers with artists or photographers.

Our final project was to create a book. In the first part of the semester, the writers would work on a short story, while the artists/ photographers were honing their skills. Each writer would pick how they wanted to express their short story (by paintings or through photos), then provide topics to the respective instructors so that they could get find their partner for the rest of the semester.

pianos on state street; santa barbara,ca

Mario decided that he preferred artwork to enhance his work, his topic being child prodigy composer. In class, the instructor wrote the topics on the dry erase board and we got to select which subject caught our interest. I played piano for 15 years, and liked to write my own music. It was a perfect match.

The writing class, art class, and photography class were all scheduled at the same time, so we were able to use class time to work with our partner to further develop our ideas.

Even before we knew we would be working together, Mario and I noticed one another right away. I was a bit too excited to find out that he would be my partner for this assignment.

It started out innocently enough. He told me more about his story and his ideas of how he wanted it portrayed and I gave him my background, offering to be a sounding board in addition to being his illustrator. We ended up having long discussions over the phone or IMing during work hours about the project and soon enough about life in general.

We had a whirlwind romance, spending as much time as we could together. He was like a drug; I couldn't get enough. Jake didn't suspect anything for a while because he knew this was our final project and he knew how important it was to me. He would have never found out if I didn't behave so impulsively.

It was a few days before our project was due. Mario and I were working on the final touches. We had already had the book bound and ready to go, but we wanted to add texture to my artwork and give it a 3D effect. I left my phone on silent and got carried away with the time. I ended up staying the night, then one night became two.

Mario and I were so in love. But I also loved Jake. I never knew I could be in love with two people at the same time. Jake made me feel safe and secure. Mario made me feel invincible and alive.

As an unspoken rule, I had always called to tell Jake when I’d be back, but this time I didn't  I was so caught up in where I was. With Mario and this project that had taken a life of its own. I knew I should have called him, but I didn't want to leave this bubble I shared with Mario. When I looked at my phone there were over 40 missed calls and my mailbox was full with messages from Jake.

As soon as I got home, I knew he knew. Jake was devastated. He hadn't slept for several days, his eyes puffy and red, face full of worry and pain. I had never seen him look so broken.

I felt awful. I wish I could say I felt guilt, but for some reason I didn't  I hurt because I had hurt him. In just a few short days, he had become a shadow of a man. He hadn't eaten, called in sick from work. His whole life stopped when he thought that I might be happier with someone other than him.

We began to fight as we struggled to work things out. He professed his undying love for me and badgered me to tell him what Mario had given me that he couldn't  His anger started to surface when I couldn't give him an answer. I didn't have an answer. The passion I felt for Mario was different than what I felt for Jake. I couldn't explain that to him because I didn't understand it myself.

He knew he wouldn't be able to stop me if I wanted to go and he begged me not to see Mario again. I suspected that he wanted to give me an ultimatum, but I knew that the thought of losing me forever frightened him enough for him to select his words carefully.

Truthfully, I never expected to have a real relationship with Mario. While we loved each other, I knew it was never going to be more than what it was. We shared a lot in those few months, but I couldn't envision spending the rest of my life with him.

After another big fight with Jake, I went to Mario because I needed to talk things through. I didn't call before I went to his apartment. I just needed to see him. He came to the door half dressed, and even though he told me how much he loved me, it was clear to me that he had a lot of love to give. 

I heard a girl in the background “Mario, mi amor, who is it?”

It wasn't too big of a surprise that Mario had moved on so quickly. In one of our many long talks he told me that he didn't believe there is only one love for each person. The idea of committing himself to one woman for the rest of his life was daunting to him. For all I know, he could have been with her the whole time.

I was very lucky that Jake was so in love with me that he wanted to honor our wedding vows, despite my infidelity. We went to many counseling sessions and worked hard to try to move forward and leave this in the past.

While he found it in his heart to forgive me, he didn't forget. 

I decided I wanted to take the photography class, but he took the writing class to make sure that we worked on the same project. He didn't want to take any chances that Mario would be there or that I would wander again.

Our project allowed us to expose different sides of ourselves to each other that the other hadn't seen before. We were married very soon after we met and this assignment helped us begin the rebuilding process of our relationship.

If I had taken the photography class to begin with, I would have never met Mario. Even if I might have seen him passing in the hallway, I had no reason to meet him or get involved. I was recently married after all, and very much in love. Being in the other class, I would have worked on a different project with someone else and all the heartache and trust issues could have been avoided.

Even though things are still better, I know that it doesn't matter what promises I make. I don’t know if I will ever completely regain Jake’s trust, but I know that I will keep trying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My younger self was as curious and superstitious as always. After inquiring about our family, our career and success, she bluntly asked if I/we would marry, have kids and have the white picket fence along with it. My future looked bleak at the time, and that was what she/I was concerned with most 5 years ago.

During our conversation, I had thought long and hard about what I wanted to reveal to her, but considering everything I had been through, I knew what I had to do.

I told my younger self, “Yes, you will get married and have kids. One last thing, our photography has really come a long way.”  

Hello Kreativitee

Why hello there!

Chase Palm Park

This year has been particularly "interesting" and by that, I definitely don't mean "interesting" in any particular way. I've settled into my current city and my job (more or less, since "change management" seems to be our middle name), but all this settling has left my brain a little, well, bored.

The right side has started nagging the left, "Ok, now that things are more routine, when can we start having fun?!" 

Well, dear right brain, NOW is the time. 

East Beach

Actually, it's been the time for the last few months. Over the summer, I started writing a few short stories and narratives. While it was a nice release, I found myself quickly out of ideas. 

Santa Barbara Harbor

Luckily I have some really awesome people in my life that have given me a few ideas on what I can do to fully embrace this flood of wanting to do something, which is why I started yet another blog. 

As it says, this will my adventures in kreativitee. (Why kreativitee? Because "creativity" was already taken, so step 1 in this creative process was to find

a domain that wasn't taken!)

Whether you stumbled upon this on accident or are one of my (maybe) 2 followers on my regular blog, welcome and enjoy!

BBF

This was the first piece I wrote. A quick narrative just to see what I could come up with. 

You have to start somewhere, right?

I met her when I was 12. She came up to me, a little shy, and said “hi”.

Not too long after that, I started getting notes from her. I can’t remember what they said, but I remember they were frequent and they were long. It took me a while to realize she liked me. I kind of figured that out when she started calling and talking to me for hours. Man, could she talk!

I didn’t mind the conversations and well, she paid me attention. I didn’t know what to say or what to do so I just listened. What can I say? I ‘m a typical guy and I was young then, girls were a mystery to me.

Years went by. I would tell her things that I didn’t share with anyone else. Not everything, but only what I was comfortable enough saying aloud. She was open and encouraging, so I kept testing the waters to see how far I could go.

We became best friends and I trusted her far more than I had ever trusted anyone else. She was so genuine and always made me feel like she really cared what I had to say.

Our friendship spanned over several decades, and would ebb and flow as most relationships do. I helped her through her parents’ divorce, several broken relationships, and through life in general. She reciprocated when I let her.

We always remained close, even when we were ebbing. I felt like she had a connection to me, as she always seemed to drop me a quick note when things were at their worst.

I had never met someone who was so kind and generous. She gave of herself as if she had an unlimited supply of love. She paid attention to things that mattered little to me, but were what she could control.

I never fell in love with her, it just wasn’t there. But I appreciated her and loved her in the only way I knew how. It was an unselfish love. I realized that I could never reciprocate her feelings so I always encouraged her to see the opportunities she had and the happiness that lie before her. I cared about her and wanted her to be happy.

Even as I sit here, staring at her grave, missing our silly conversations, our witty banter, I have to give her credit. She’s the only person in my life that was always there for me.